!dadjokes@lemmy.world
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Update 2025-9-11: If you cannot tell this joke to a 5-year-old and they would understand, you should probably post it to the this community: !unclejokes@lemmy.world. Please message me if you think it could be different.
Also Australia.
It got warm the next day, and they melted.
Every now and then I drop a real zinger in my group chats
She’s a night mare
I guess it really is a rare medium well-done.
She said she was a roamin’ Catholic.
I got a match right away. 🔥
They forced me to do all kinds of horrific things for their sick pleasure.
Wednesday is open Mike night.
Never again.
Because they’re in-sects.
Some day I hope to be a bouillonaire
“Mmmm, bar tender!”
It turns out she suffers from my grains….
I thought I would at least get a Snicker
And I was like, “Well, damn.”
Hole Foods!
Then I had a change of heart
Pillow cases!
A calcunow!
cross-posted from: https://ani.social/post/22420695
When she found out she hit the roof….
I think there’s a Ghost of a Chance.
They can only draw blood!
He was squaring in the house of God.
The Dead Sea!
Grrraiinnnns!
The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song but chickpeas can only humus one.
They’re afraid to unwind!
From https://tribe.net/@AbsoluteMemery/115429876741020387
It dampens their spirits!
One day I hope to be good at it.
A poultrygeist!
Scare-spray!
Watch out for the reaper cushions!
Spelling!
it’s grate!
The bike was just too tired.
A Himhe bar!
Sometimes this is a tankless job.
cross-posted from: https://piefed.world/post/575939
They’ve reduced meowers.
Because demons are a ghouls best friend!
Spooktacles!
Because some relationships don’t work out!
Coral Reefs 🪸
Her vehicle goes broom-broom
In college they were broom mates
You give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.
“I don’t think Charlie is such a bad choice of name, even for a girl,” I told her.
cross-posted from: https://piefed.world/post/550282
A hardened criminal.
A small medium at large.
And to that I said - “well, it’s a long story.”
2025-10-11
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/37182364
Because they cantaloupe!
She’s a Bordeaux collie.
Because it’s a dead language!
Local votes are a bit more private.
Default mode: public.
bookwyr.me
loopy
jordanlund
potoooooooo ☑️
PortNull
Tug
ZDL
The Picard Maneuver
slothrop
TheImpressiveX
Jerb322
BananaPeal
Iced Raktajino
FenrirIII
Cevilia (she/they/…)
smeg
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guynamedzero
Hossenfeffer
gigastasio
WhatsHerBucket
SnokenKeekaGuard
BeatTakeshi
cally [he/they]
PinkyCoyote